


trick-or-treat !

by desla_be



Series: SanSan Halloween [3]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff without Plot, Halloween, Light Smut, One Shot, Trick or Treating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-31
Updated: 2020-10-31
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:21:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27277177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/desla_be/pseuds/desla_be
Summary: Sandor continually tries to stop trick-or-treaters from interrupting his make-out session with Sansa on Halloween, but they just keep showing up no matter what he does. And they stole his fucking candy bowl right off the porch!
Relationships: Sandor Clegane & Sansa Stark, Sandor Clegane/Sansa Stark
Series: SanSan Halloween [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1967746
Comments: 12
Kudos: 41





	trick-or-treat !

_ Ding-dong! _

Sandor opened his eyes to see Sansa chuckling at him silently, gauging his blatantly irritable expression. 

He sat up reluctantly and she scooted off his lap, crossing her legs on the center couch cushion. Her cheeks were flush and the first few buttons of her blouse were undone and as he walked backwards from her, he thought he’d like to wring the neck of whoever had rung his doorbell. It pained him to walk out of the living room, but he knew it would only be a few moments before he would be back as he swiped the wide bowl of candy off the bar top. 

Sandor swung the door open carelessly, taking care to keep his waist-down out of the frame. 

“Trick-or-treat! Trick-or-treat!” came a group of childish voices, and Sandor identified a short Frankenstein with patchy black hair smiling up brightly. There was a witch beside him, and another child as well, and he probably would’ve sworn at them if their parents weren’t standing only several feet away. 

He grabbed a fistful of candy and quickly, unevenly dispersed the pieces into their outstretched candy-collecting bags. 

“Thank you, sir!” one of them said, peeking at his scars under a mess of charcoal hair. “Thank you, happy Halloween!” 

“Happy Halloween,” Sandor grumbled agitatedly, pulled the bowl back through the frame and shut the door. He turned the porch lights off in attempts to deter people from coming back. 

As he walked back into the living room, he saw abruptly that Sansa’s lacy purple bra was now splayed across his coffee table and almost jizzed himself before he could get to the couch. She bit her bottom lip, and when he returned to sit beside her, she helped him stretch out and made herself comfortable again in his lap. 

Sandor pulled her close and drew his lips up to her neck, tracing her collarbone with featherlight fingers and holding her hip firmly with his free hand. He shifted his hips under her, and she giggled at him when he cursed. 

“Stop that,” he said, grinning up at her against his will. 

“No,” she smiled, reaching to her chest to undo the next couple of buttons. 

“Well okay,” he fixated on her hands. 

She peeled back the unbuttoned corners and Sandor’s breath caught. “Kiss me,” Sansa said, tracing lines over her breast with her index finger, “here.” 

He swallowed, eyes wide, and nodded his enthusiasm. She leaned forward and he met her with his lips, kissing her fair skin tenderly over and over again. Sansa twisted her hands into his shirt, swaying her hips back and forth much too lightly over his lap. He was swirling his tongue around one of her nipples when the doorbell rang again. 

_ Ding-dong! _

Sandor thought for a moment and decided to ignore it, taking Sansa’s nipple into his mouth and wondering if she would like for him to bite it.

“Sandor,” she said, “the door.” 

He looked up at her again, his mouth still on her flesh, and she smiled. Her eyes were dark. After a moment of evaluation, he pulled his mouth away from her nipple and released it with a kiss. 

“I turned the porch lights off. They’ll leave.” 

“It’s Halloween,” she tilted her head disapprovingly. “It’s _one night_ you have to answer the door. The only night of the year people dare to step onto your property.”

Sandor sighed his displeasure dramatically. 

“I can get it if you want me to,” she offered. 

“No,” he said, knowing well how long she’d take talking to every single little shithead and their parents. _Such a nice little costume you have!_ or _And who do we have here?_ or _Isn’t that a pretty dress!_

Sandor got up from beneath her, staggered to the candy bowl on the countertop, his head spinning madly, and then to the door. 

“Trick-or-treat! Trick-or-treat!” little voices shouted enthusiastically. 

He glared at a gauzy zombie and a short princess in a yellow dress. “Did you not see that the light was off? Don’t you know that you’re not supposed to stop at houses with no lights on?”

The two little faces looked up to him, then to each other, and then up to him again in fear. “We... uh...”

Sandor was about to throw candy at them when he felt a hand on his shoulder and turned his head. 

“And who do we have here?” Sansa asked excitedly, a big fluffy blanket from Sandor’s recliner bundled around her. She squeezed around him, snatched the bowl of candy from him and held it out to the two kids on the doorstep, smiling at their responses and wishing them happy Halloweens and letting them take three pieces of candy each. 

“Thank you!” they beamed, and gave Sandor final looks before fleeing the porch.

Sansa turned to him. “You can’t use that tone with children!” she patted his arm disapprovingly. 

Sandor sighed frustratedly. When she gave the bowl of candy back to him, he put in on the porch. That way, if _more_ people came up, they’d hopefully just take it and leave. “They’re so many of them,” he complained. “And they came up even though the lights were off.”

“It’s Halloween, Sandor, what do you expect?” 

“I don’t really _do_ Halloween, Sansa. October thirty-first on a normal year, I’m in my bed with all the house lights off watching tv and trying to ignore the screaming kids outside.” 

Sansa took the blanket off of her shoulders and spread it across the couch cushions. “Why would you buy Halloween candy if you didn’t plan on giving it out?”

“For myself.” He thought it should’ve been fairly obvious. 

“Sandor, you bought the _five-hundred-piece_ bag. Surely it wasn’t _just_ for you.” 

He crossed his arms. “There’s nothing wrong with eating candy on Halloween. That’s what the holiday is _for_.” 

“The holiday is _not_ for you to eat candy all day.”

”Tell that to fucking _Walmart.”_

“You’re so annoying,” she said as she laid back and placed her head against the arm rest. 

“I know,” Sandor climbed on the couch. “You, on the other hand, are very beautiful.” 

Sansa rolled her eyes. She cradled his cheek with one hand, tangled the other in his hair, and her legs came up to wrap around his hips. 

Sandor sighed brokenly. He looked down into the phthalo pits of her eyes and fell into them, sinking and sinking until he couldn’t see anything anymore, and out of nowhere he felt himself shudder as her tongue touched him between the lips. He moaned, despite himself, and there she was snickering at his frustration again. 

“Stop laughing at me,” he complained. 

Her eyes glowed as she smiled at him. “It’s only because you’re cute.”

“I’m _not_ ‘cute’.” 

Sansa used her grip on his neck to pull him down ever so slightly, and leaned up so that her lips touched his. He stayed as still as possible, trying to level his unstable, manic breathing, and holding his breath so that she wouldn’t giggle at him again. He thought he was doing a good job until he heard _that fucking noise_ again. 

_Ding-dong! Ding-dong ding-dong ding-dong_. 

“For the love of fucking _god!_ ” he barked, pulling himself off the couch, huffing with a fury as he stalked to the door. 

“Sandor,” he heard her say somewhere between his ringing ears. 

“—I put the fucking _bowl_ out there, it’s not exactly _neuroscience_.“ 

He flung the front door open. “Do the lights being off mean _nothing_ to you? Does that bowl of candy mean _nothing_?” he growled, flicking the switch and looking around for whoever was on his porch. It was a little yellow dinosaur, barely taller than his knees. 

Sandor blinked. “Where’s my bowl?” 

The little yellow dinosaur looked around, shrugging and taking a step away from him in presumable terror at his loud voice. 

He turned to Sansa, who’d appeared behind him again. “Can you believe it? They took my fucking bowl.”

She smacked his arm and pushed him away from the frame. “Sandor!” she hushed. “Stop swearing!”

”I know, I know. Hold on,” he groaned, and crossed the kitchen to reach into the cupboard for his personal stash of Halloween candy. He took two chocolates out and brought them back to the door, crouching down and placing them in the little dinosaur’s hand. “Here,” he said flatly. “Happy Halloween.” 

“Thank... you,” the tiny human muttered and ran off the porch, back to the adults that waited by Sandor’s mailbox. 

“They took my fucking _bowl_ ,” Sandor complained again when the door was closed. “I liked that bowl. Now I’ll have to go buy another.” 

“Sandor, you got that bowl from the dollar store _yesterday_. It’s not like it was some priceless heirloom.” 

“Says you,” he turned the lock on the front door. “ _You_ wanted to use a crystal serving dish. Thank god we didn’t do that. Last thing I need is for you to go getting the mail and cutting your foot on glass because some little twats wanted to play monkey-in-the-middle on the porch with your _priceless heirloom._ ”

“Well everything’s fine now,” said Sansa. “It’s almost eleven, there probably won’t be any more trick-or-treaters.” She grabbed his hand. “Couch?”

“No,” Sandor pleaded. “The couch is hexed, obviously. My bed will be better.“

”Your _cave,_ you mean.”

”That, too,” he said, playing with the last buttons on her blouse as she teetered on her toes. “If any trick-or-treaters come looking for more candy, I’m sure your moaning will send them the other way.”

Sansa scoffed. “You _wish,_ ” she said as they walked into the darkness towards his door. “ _You_ sound like an animal being hung up for slaughter. They’ll probably think we’re staging a haunted house. Go get a knife; we can turn the window light on and I’ll pretend to stab you repeatedly like in Psycho.”

”Fuck off.” Sandor climbed onto the bed and put an arm on the other side of her.

She laughed, and reached for the button on his pants. “It’s okay. Whichever one of us moans louder, at least we know they’ll be too spooked to knock again.”

**Author's Note:**

> hello! hoped you liked this and thanks for reading :)


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